a page from my journal

The smooth  cool tile of the shower stall was a welcome counterpoint to the driving hot streams of water cascading against her neck and back . She stood there letting the steam , heat and water wash away the fog inside her head. Slowly she was coming back to herself, breaching the surface of the night's events . With a small exhale and a shiver despite the warmth of the shower she could still taste him on her lips , the could still feel his touch on her skin , the feel of him inside her.  The haze of lust and the exhilaration of the forbidden was clinging to her like gossamer threads of silk . The first cold fingers of reality began to claw at her mind and soul as the florescent bathroom light buzzed over head and made her close her eyes against its  brightness .. intruding through the shower curtain. Regret , shame .. the truth began to mingle in her mind as the water began to cool and the steam abate... Fuzzy moments slowly coming into focus ..grabbing the soap to scrub away his scent , his touch ... her emotions...  "conquest" she murmured  to herself .. then let a cynical chuckle escape her throat as she ran her finger gingerly across a bruise on her thigh ... the soreness bringing her completely back to herself.  Stepping out  of the shower .. wrapping her hair in a towel and easing into a bathrobe .. she  says to her barely visable reflection .. "Next time .. next time it will be different".